A day in the life of Wika

And so it begins...

2011-11-10T10:00:00.003-10:00

9:37 am sitting in class and have just been notified that as of 10:30 am a strike has been called for union members at my company. Even though I am not a union employee, I am expected to support the union and walk alongside them.

I will do no such thing.

The union has made threats to photograph all the scabs and post their information on their website under their "Hall of Shame". Whether this is just a scare tactic or fear mongering in play, this threat does not dissuade me from crossing the line.

I have to do what I have to do to take care of myself and to stand up for my own principles and beliefs. I do not pay union dues, and I do not receive union benefits. The union will not pay me if I walk yet I'm expected to give up everything to support their motives and agendas.

I understand their struggle and the importance of having support, but frankly, my reasons are specifically that... my reasons. I am not in a position to forgoe any pay. I have been out of work for the past 8 months, and have only been employed here for a mere 3 weeks, however the union expects me to walk with them in support of solidarity. But where will they be when I need help? I need to make ends meet and I have bills to pay... will they walk with me then? I think not.

At the end of the day... or the beginning should I say... We all have choices to make. I've made my choices in life, and my life is choice!

I will be back to document my journey. Good luck to everyone involved :o\

Auld Lang Syne

2010-01-14T20:12:00.017-10:00

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? A question to which the answer is perfectly clear to me. 2009 effectively ended a particularly toxic friendship, and since doing so, I've accomplished so much more than I would have otherwise. From something as simple as driving across a state line to a little more substantial like getting completely out of debt, I accomplished many if not all of the goals I set out for 2009. Sure, some are bigger than others, but they are accomplishments all the same.

My year started off on Maui, then a few weeks later, the Martin Luther King Day weekend found me in Florida driving across the state border into Georgia. My first small goal accomplished, but still a great way to start off the year. An unexpected detour forced me to stop in Los Angeles, where I enjoyed a night on the piss in Hollywood and a late night breakfast with 2 friends I hadn't seen in ages.

For President's Day weekend in February, just 2 weeks or so after I returned from Los Angeles, I made a quick decision to take another trip, effectively accomplishing two more goals... meeting my dear friend Andrés, and my lifelong goal of visiting New York City. When I wasn't busy sightseeing in the Big Apple, I found myself chatting with an old friend in France, and a new friend in Scotland.

March, April, and May found me hosting friends from out of town, some of whom I met previously, and others whom I had the pleasure of meeting for the first time. One in particular left quite an impression on me and I fell in love with him as a friend the second we met. His name is Giovanni. Not only did we get along like a house on fire, but he also introduced me to some incredible music which I also immediately fell in love with. I didn't know it at the time, but he lit a fire under me to stop being afraid, stop making excuses and just do for me what I've neglected doing my entire life... and I've never looked back since.

The next big thing I wanted to accomplish was to go somewhere spectacular in June to celebrate my 30th birthday. It is a significant milestone, and I wanted to do something that was reflective of such. The big day was just 2 weeks away and I still didn't have any plans. I refused to spend my 30th home alone, or worse yet at work, so I decided to take a week off and visit some very special friends in New Zealand who I hadn't seen since 2007. Carlos and Toby spoiled me in Kaikoura, Hanmer Springs and Christchurch for a few days before I flew up to spend time with Jay and Simon in Auckland. I was extremely pleased with my decision to fly back to New Zealand and loved that I got to celebrate this milestone with people I love.

By July I was chatting and speaking to Martin in Scotland (the fella I mentioned previously while I was in NY) quite frequently. We were constantly pissing ourselves laughing and getting on like you would not believe. I'm not exactly sure how it all came about, but I ended up booking a weekend trip to spend time with this fascinating new friend. My trip to Glasgow ended up being a little longer than I originally anticipated, but was everything I knew it would be.

On my way to Glasgow, I had a long layover in Denver and was able to have breakfast with one of my greatest friends Jerrod... who happened to be there on my first stop I made back in 2006 when I started this adventurous travel behaviour I became so accustomed to. His mother, sister, and daughter flew out to Hawai'i in June and we had a terrific time in Waikiki... of course I was sad that I didn't have a chance to spend time with him as well, so this breakfast was extra sweet icing on the cake!

On my way back from Glasgow, I stopped off in Las Vegas. Naturally, I thought I would hit the mega bucks jackpot and be able to retire, but alas, no such luck. I did manage to win a couple hundred dollars, and somehow lost it all the last 15 minutes in the casino. At least I broke even, so not a total loss.

While in Glasgow, Martin treated me like a king and I was anxious to return the favour. He ended up flying out to Hawai'i just before his 27th birthday in September. His birthday landed on a Friday so we had a nice Thai dinner celebration with him. As a "surprise" (which I always seem to muck up and it never ends up being an actual surprise) I took him on a weekend trip to Kaua'i, the island I'm originally from. Watching his excitement from jumping in the pool was priceless, and other than a mix up of booking the wrong hotel, everything went off according to plan and we had a fantastic time.

Martin and I spent the next 3 months together and I can't think of anything that could have made it even the slightest bit better. From going to the cinema to just watching a film at home, I enjoyed every moment of everything we did. I was gutted to see him leave, but cherish the time we spent together. Martin has been incredibly supportive of me from day one and has been there every step of the way in changes I've made for a better me... and I will always be grateful. He's offered encouragement and is definitely adding fuel to the fire that Giovanni had lit months ago.

Fast forward to present day. I look back over the past year and notice all the love and support I have in my life and I am overwhelmed. I can't believe how lucky I am to have such beautiful people in my life. I sit here... stronger and more confident than ever, ready to accomplish even bigger and better goals for myself and my future. How can I not love being alive?

Aloha 2009!

2009-12-31T23:53:00.002-10:00

5 minutes until 2010 and i must admit, i'm a little sad to see 2009 come to an end. it was by far the most amazing year ever.

Mutilation

2009-09-10T01:22:00.011-10:00

23rd June, I'll remember this day.

Why did the doctor take me this way?
My mommy and daddy are right over there.
You better return me, they love me, I swear!
Where are we going? What's thru this door?
Huh? A Gomco clamp... What is that for?
I'm scared and confused, I just started life.
What is a scalpel? It looks like a knife!
There's clamping and pulling, I just felt a tug...
Where is my mommy? I need a hug.
There's cutting and slicing, I'm starting to bleed...
I'm crying so hard, I can hardly breath!
No anesthesia... just excruciating pain!

You're destroying my body and cutting my veins!

Ow mommy it hurts, please make them stop!!
Am I in a hospital or a butcher shop?
Why don't you love me... what did I do?
I promise I'll be better, just give me a clue.
I'm covered in blood, my prepuce discarded.
I'm left unprotected and now broken hearted.
You allowed them to hurt me yet you were my voice.
I don't understand, I had no choice.

Savagely mutilated and forever scorned...

I rue the day that I was born.

A Moment In Scotland

2009-08-19T13:50:00.064-10:00

I seem to have no problems making friends around the world... in fact, I've championed doing so. In late January / early February I made yet another online connection with a fella named Martin in Glasgow... just another day in the life of Wika! Despite the extreme time difference between us (11 hours) we somehow managed to find the time to speak on the phone or chat online. As days turned into weeks and weeks into months, we grew to be very close and nurtured an extremely healthy and upbeat friendship.

One slow evening at my 2nd job found me browsing through online airfares to Scotland. I found a great deal on a return fare for a week and a half from the day I was looking online. Naturally, I booked it and decided to fly out to Glasgow for the weekend. (Why not right?!) The last time I was in the UK was over 10 years ago so I was quite excited. Although most of my excitement came from knowing that I was able to meet this amazing new friend who I grew to know so well.

After what seemed to be an eternity in the air, I found myself buzzing the doorbell to his flat. It was a tricky little device and left me a bit confused as to how it's meant to function. I assumed that once you press the button the person on the other end is meant to buzz you in. Alas, I saw a speaker box so I ended up pressing the button again to speak but was distracted when I saw a little camera looking at me. I giggled to myself because I had no idea what I was doing, but before I knew it, there he was opening the door and giving me a big hug.

It was interesting because we carry on for hours over the phone talking about everything and nothing... and I wondered if the same dynamic would exist in person. I've mentioned to him before meeting that I am more myself with him than anyone else and it still held true from the moment we met. But that's not to say that I wasn't nervous. My main focus the first moments in his flat was this big tree I could see just outside the window. It was an easy target to focus on rather than the butterflies that were in my stomach and the fact that my mind was going 180 miles a minute. Thankfully, it didn't take long to get comfortable and for the nervous energy to fade away.

Of course my wonderfully weird thought process took me on so many different tangents and I eventually started to daydream what it would be like to become familiar with this tree. I won't go into the specifics of it all but I will say that I notice details that would otherwise go unnoticed by most everyone else. And not to say that I don't enjoy siteseeing or typical tourist attractions, but I tend to remember and cherish special moments much more.

One of these special moments stemmed from an interesting observation by Martin. An ongoing joke between us is the style of music that I tend to find myself listening to... deep, dark, and sometimes even a bit dimented. I find a strange comfort in these types of songs and end up getting lost in the music. In response to this, Martin decided to show me the brighter side of music and played one song in particular for me... bruises by Chairlift.

I never heard the song before but found it incredibly charming and rather catchy. Randomly throughout my stay, Martin would sing the song to me and it never failed to bring a smile to my face. One evening he planned to show me a bit of the nightlife so we headed down to a local gay bar. It was a pretty quiet night, but that certainly didn't stop us from having a blast. We ended up making friends with the DJ who asked if we had a song, to which Martin replied bruises.

The song started to play and instantly put an enormous smile on my face. Martin took me by the hand, pulled me close and sang to me as we danced. I was in a trance... absolutely capitivated as I just stared into his baby blue eyes and smiled. Time seemed to pass in slow motion allowing me to savour every detail about that moment. The way our bodies moved together, the way he smiled as he sang to me, the way he looked at me... they made me feel incredible and sent me over the moon. My mind was racing while my body fluttered with excitement. I could only think of how wonderful he makes me feel and how much I love him and love having him in my life. At that very moment, the world could have been ending around us and I wouldn't have even noticed... or cared for that matter. Thus creating the absolute best moment ever in my life, and by far my most favourite.

What was meant to be a 3 day weekend getaway turned into nearly 2 weeks of absolute bliss. We had lots of yummy food and drinks and even managed to catch a flick at the world's tallest cinema. The city was incredible and the architecture simply breathtaking. We took the subway to get around and of course it reminded me of my trip to New York earlier in the year which was coincidentally right around the time I first started chatting with Martin.

I got a glimpse into Martin's daily routine and dare I say, I fit in quite nicely. Now it's my turn to return the favour and show him around my side of the world. White sandy beaches, tropical island breezes and drinks with little umbrellas wait to greet him... oh, and an eager Hawaiian as well.

What if....

2009-07-28T10:19:00.010-10:00

What if it truly doesn’t matter what I do but how I do it? What if the fulfillment of my own happiness is not dependent on finding a different way of living but really about accepting my life right now? What if my contribution to this world is merely to appreciate it as it is? What if there is no need to change or to better myself? What if the essence of who I am and always have been are enough? What if the question isn't, why am I not the man I really want to be?, but, why don't I want to be the man that really I am?

What if becoming who you truly are happens not through striving but by recognizing the people that offer you the encouragement you need to unfold? What if the task is simply to be who you already are in your essential nature? What if you knew that the impulse to react creates beauty in the world and will guide you every time you simply pay attention? How would this shape your stillness, your movement, your willingness to follow this impulse to just let go and dance?

Aotearoa

2009-06-26T04:02:00.002-10:00

2 long years had passed since I'd been with you last... land of the long white cloud. I am greeted by an overwhelming joy before I can even see you. By the time I catch my first glimpse of your shores my heart is smiling and my mind is at ease... I'm coming home. From the stunning beauty of your snow-capped mountains to the sweet melodies of birds that fill your skies, you evoke an explosion of emotions.

I reached a milestone in my life... 30 years old this year, and was able to pass my time and celebrate my life with you. But alas our time together is short and leaving you is always the hardest thing I have to do. The only thing that makes leaving tolerable is knowing that we'll be together again.

Although thousands of miles of Pacific Ocean separates us, it seems as though you're never too far away... I always find my way back to you. My heart shall always have a special place reserved for you. I long to spend the rest of my days with you.

wika-itis

2009-04-18T21:12:00.001-10:00

i'm suffering from a severe case if wika-itis tonight.

There's still hope!

2009-04-04T17:23:00.014-10:00

Today marks the 41st anniversary of the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. My words could never do justice for what he's achieved in his lifetime. Whenever I hear his name, I am filled with an overwhelming sense of pride. I am proud that a man had the courage to fight for equal rights and to bring an end to racial segregation and discrimination... eventually making the ultimate sacrifice for his dream. Although he's long passed, he is synonymous with the Civil Rights movement. There is constant debate whether or not gay marriage can be considered a Civil Rights issue, but all the same, the struggle is just as real.

The Gay Rights movement has taken a big step forward and there is a definite cause for celebration as we received terrific news from Iow a. The Iowa Supreme Court struck down the ban on marriage between same-sex couples in a unanimous decision. Iowa now joins Massachusetts and Connecticut and is the third state to have full legal marriage for same-sex couples. Way to go Iowa!!

Across the way, Vermont House voted 95 - 52 to allow same sex couples to marry. I was able to tune in and listen to the event unfold via a live stream broadcast online. It was an emotional session with incredible testimony that moved me to tears on a few occasions. Just shy of a super majority, the bill is still subject to an imminent veto as promised by the Vermont Governor. Even so, there's still hope! You can e-mail VT legislature to ask them to override the veto.

Meanwhile, back in Hawai'i... the Civil Unions Bill is still sitting in committee. I received an e-mail with the amended version of the Civil Unions Bill. This revision does in fact reflect that same-sex partners cannot be lumped into the same category as blood relatives and siblings as reciprocal beneficiaries. I just want to remind people that there's still hope! Although the Senate did not pull the bill to the floor, the bill is still alive. The legislative session is ongoing and there are numerous options to revive the bill in its current and/or amended form.

You may be asking yourself, what can I do? Well, it is crucial to maintain a continued presence at the capitol and it is important to continue making calls, sending e-mails, as well as mailing hand written letters to all of our Senators . The Family Equality Coalition is a great source of information for maintaining such a presence at the capitol as well as upcoming events in support of the bill. Please take the time to sign up and stay in the loop... remember, there's still hope!

More from The Family Equality Coalition Hawai'i:

As we want to keep all options that could unify the Senate on this issue, a legal team is examining the proposal in detail, but the measure clearly states, "civil unions partners shall not have the same rights and obligations under law that are conferred through marriage." Partial equality is not an option, but await a full review.

Coming Up...
Be on the lookout for an on-line advocacy action in the next few days. Again, as the bill is still alive, our voice must continue to reach the senators. Your immediate action is imperative!
Mark your calendars for April 17. A healing and affirmative experience - much like our recent Light The Night For Equality candlelight vigil - is in the works at Unity Church. Details will be coming soon!

Aloha also means goodbye

2009-03-29T17:47:00.018-10:00

I've never had a loyalty to any inter-island carrier so I always flew the most affordable. Of all the traveling I've done, I have to admit, I rarely traveled with Aloha Airlines for a couple different reasons, mostly due to high fares. I don't have any fond memories... In fact, what comes to mind are what I strongly disliked about their service. I begrudgingly admit that although I didn't particularly enjoy their service I absolutely loved the look of their older aircraft. Well, not that particular one flying from Hilo to Honolulu with an emergency landing in Kahului, but if you look closely you'll see it has some really groovy colour schemes. Ah yes, here's a much more flattering photo of one of their jets:

Self proclaimed as "the people's airline", Aloha Airlines ceased operations on the 31st of March 2008 laying off 1,900 employees, the largest mass layoff in Hawai'i. Needless to say, the 1 year anniversary of their demise is on many peoples' minds as evident by the front page of today's Honolulu Advertiser reading:

For ex-Aloha crew, it's been a rough ride

1 year after layoffs, many are working for less pay, if they're working at all

I work two full time jobs, one of which happens to employ a lot of former Aloha Airlines employees. I don't mean to be distasteful but all I've been hearing lately are the woe is me cries from them. I am certainly sensitive to the situation, but the constant bleating got old a long long time ago. There's a difference between being sad about something and undeniably living in the past. I read the above mentioned article, as well as several other articles related to the airline closure. These are a few of my favourite quotes:

"Many are working for less pay, if they're working at all". Well, when you were making $25 - $30 an hour, it's rather difficult to find comparable starting wages especially in Hawai'i.
"The company blamed soaring fuel prices and a fare war touched off by the June 2006 launch of interisland carrier go!" It couldn't possibly be poor upper management, lack of operating cost efficiency and overpaid employees could it?
[from a former flight attendant now working as kitchen help]The job pays about half of what she was earning at Aloha and is more physically demanding. "My hands are all cut up and I get tired standing in front of a sink all day." Honey, that's life... suck it up and earn that pretty penny like everyone else.
"The overall feeling is what happened wasn't just another company closing its doors. It was something more than that." Therein lies the problem, it WAS just another company closing its doors. Where is the delusion coming from that they are elite or somehow different than the other 1,200 people who were laid off last month alone in Hawai'i?

I understand that it's difficult to be laid off from any job, I was laid off before and my unemployment benefit paid me $208 every 2 weeks. Did I complain about it? NO, I dusted myself off and hustled to find work. I think it's time for them to stop living off the past achievements of Aloha Airlines and definitely stop wallowing in their failures. Maybe then they'll finally be able to get off their high horses with gold plated saddles and realize that Aloha also means goodbye.

If You're Out There!

2009-03-27T14:02:00.000-10:00

I remember a time before pay cuts, before nationwide foreclosures, and before record unemployment. Ah yes, those times when I only worked 1 full time job, and that was enough to sustain a comfortable existence. Not only did I enjoy the luxuries of financial freedom, but it was a time when Honolulu had a GLBT center... a place where anyone could find support and resources. The Center, as it was called and later took the name of Aloha Pride Center, was founded in 1973, 4 years after the Stonewall riots and 6 years before I was even born.

The Aloha Pride Center offered services to Honolulu's GLBT community such as support groups and referrals for medical care as well as helping coordinate the annual Pride Parade. In the 80's the APC helped educate the general public about HIV & the importance of safe sex. In the 90's it lobbied the State Legislature for same sex marriage rights. Alas, in March 2008, the APC shut its doors and discontinued all of its programs.

I'm frustrated that it's been over a year and the GLBT community still has nowhere to turn for direction or support. Part of the reason the Civil Unions bill didn't pass the Senate was because the Churches and opposition (the red shirts) were so much more organized than the supporters of the bill. Thousands of red shirts rallied together, stormed the capitol and made their voices heard, meanwhile, I was 1 of about 7 people showing support for the bill that same day.

The red shirts continued their scare tactics campaign and fought hard... writing letters, making calls to Senators, even having children call and write their Senators. On more than one occasion I witnessed fieldtrips of red shirt children walking to the State Capitol holding signs in opposition of the Civil Unions bill. Of course they probably didn't know why they were doing it, rather just following directions. The red shirts' strategies (as demented as they are) were clearly organized and well executed.

Why then are people still questioning why the Senators went back on their word and buckled under the pressure? The answer is perfectly clear... the red shirts' voices were heard loud and clear meanwhile the GLBT community and supporters' voices were not. Reason being there is not one particular organization that is taking the lead on any GLBT issues. The Family Equality Coalition seems to be the forerunners for doing just this, but unfortunately they're not well known. One great outcome from the recent Civil Unions coverage is that FEC was named by the media and hopefully will give people a source to go to for direction. PFLAG has also been very vocal and supportive as well as a handful of smaller organizations.

Until we are able to have one voice, we will continue to struggle to be heard. I've been waiting for a leader to emerge, but alas, that leader has not as of yet. So I've taken matters into my own hands and decided to start tapping into my own resources. I am currently attempting to set up a meeting with some very influential local people to discuss forming a new nonprofit organization to replicate the services and functionality of the Aloha Pride Center. I have also contacted the sole survivor of the APC, and he's doing his best to reinvent the purpose of APC to focus on "equal rights for the GLBT community" since this seems to be the most pressing issue.

A long and bumpy road lay ahead, but it's about time I show some initiative and be proactive in finding a solution... so this is my rallying call of sorts. My intent is to create a line of communication amongst like minded individuals and organizations alike to work together with one voice. In the meantime, the Family Equality Coalition is much more focused and staffed to handle this quest than any other organization at the moment. So friends, family and supporters, IF YOU'RE OUT THERE please take the time to sign up and support the Family Equality Coalition. As John Legend says, "the future started yesterday and we're already late".

The Fight Continues...

2009-03-26T22:46:00.000-10:00

I'm sure everyone is aware by now that there were insufficient votes by Senators to pull Civil Unions bill HB 444 HD1 out of the Senate Judiciary & Government Affairs Committee for a full Senate vote. But I'm not so sure everyone is aware of why this has happened, so allow me to share my understanding of what went down.

In order for the bill to be pulled for a full Senate vote 9 votes were needed... we got 6. Initially we had the support of Senate Judiciary Chair Brian Taniguchi and Co-chair Dwight Takamine. Those 2 as well as Clarence Nishihara, also on the Senate Judiciary & Government Affairs Committee, were the ones who voted in favor of HB 444 HD1. These 3 plus the other 6 Senators would have been sufficient number of Senators needed to pull the bill for a full Senate hearing and vote.

Be it as it may, the only question considered on Wednesday to pull HB 444, was a technical procedural matter. Several Senators got into the merits of HB 444 to explain why they voted for or against the pull. Those few who voted YES did so because it was the ethical thing to do and was more a matter of principle. The oppositions' main excuse was because to pull the bill would be disruptive and disrespectful to the entire process of the committee... UGH!

There is a process which allows bills to be pulled from committees for a full vote, but according to Senator Sam Slom this was reserved for those important bills which the committee chairs failed to hear. The argument would of course "legitimize" those NO votes. However, there are other reasons that are being talked about that hopefully will be explored and discussed in the media.

Take a closer look at the politics of it all and you'll see how extremely convenient they are. Last session, Senator Hanabusa said that the Senate would not consider any action regarding Civil Unions for the GLBT community unless the House passed a bill to the Senate. Frankly, this is what happened and Hanabusa simply did not follow through. Hanabusa is likely going to run for either Governor or for Neil Abercrombie's Congressional Representative seat. If you think back, Hanabusa is the one who conveniently put Slom, Gabbard and Bunda (all conservatives) on the Judiciary & Government Affairs Committee with 3 relatively progressive Democrats. With 3 conservatives and 3 progressives surely the end result will be a tie on controversial bills, thus not passing anything that would bring attention to, nor force Hanabusa to take a stand on.

Hanabusa also named conservative Donna Mercado Kim as Chair of the Ways & Means Committee. Kim threatened Senators that if they voted in favor to support HB 444, the bills that would offer funds to their districts would not likely see the light of day. But still, a few brave Senators voted YES because they believed it was the right thing to do. The others fell in line like good little sheep because it might adversely impact their districts and constituents... of course if this happened, they may not be reelected.

So there you have it... reasons for not voting to pull HB 444: procedural, seeking higher office or their next election and lastly threats from leadership. And of course what I gather to be a reason for a handful (Slom, Gabbard, Hemmings, Bunda & Kim): bigotry. However, we did find some champions in Hooser, Ihara, Baker, Chun-Oakland, Fukunaga and especially Michelle Kidani. Kidani is a freshman Senator and said that she had to vote the way she thought was right despite what Taniguchi and Takamine previously said about their position to pull the bill she said this would remain her position.

We've certainly made progress on this front, but it's absurd to stop here. A handful of bloggers, and agencies are praising these 6 for their commitment to justice. While that's fine and dandy, it's not the direction I necessarily want to go. I have separated the Senators into 3 groups and provided their contact information. It is imperative we as a community come together and demand our voices be heard. Remember, if everyone does a little, no one has to do a lot. So PLEASE contact our Senators and let them know how important it is to not let this bill die.

Here are the Senators who support the bill, but failed to show their support yesterday:

English, J. Kalani (D) - 808-587-7225
senenglish@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Espero, Will (D) - 808-586-6360
senespero@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Galuteria, Brickwood (D) - 808-586-6740
sengaluteria@capitol.hawaii.gov
Green, Josh (D) - 808-586-9385
sengreen@capitol.hawaii.gov
Hanabusa, Colleen (D) - 808-586-7793
senhanabusa@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Hee, Clayton (D) - 808-586-7330
senhee@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Ige, David Y. (D) - 808-586-6230
sendige@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Kokubun, Russell S. (D) - 808-586-6760
senkokubun@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Nishihara, Clarence K. (D) - 808-586-6970
sennishihara@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Takamine, Dwight Y. (D) - 808-586-7335
sentakamine@capitol.hawaii.gov
Taniguchi, Brian T. (D) - 808-586-6460
sentaniguchi@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Tokuda, Jill N. (D) - 808-587-7215
sentokuda@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Tsutsui, Shan S. (D) - 808-586-7344
sentsutsui@Capitol.hawaii.gov

These are the Senators who vocally oppose the bill:

Bunda, Robert (D) - 808-586-6090
senbunda@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Gabbard, Mike (D) - 808-586-6830
sengabbard@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Hemmings, Fred (R) - 808-587-8388
senhemmings@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Kim, Donna Mercado (D) - 808-587-7200
senkim@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Sakamoto, Norman (D) - 808-586-8585
sensakamoto@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Slom, Sam (R) - 808-586-8420
senslom@Capitol.hawaii.gov

Here are the brave few who stood up for justice and equality:

Baker, Rosalyn H. (D) - 808-586-6070
senbaker@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Chun Oakland, Suzanne (D) - 808-586-6130
senchunoakland@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Fukunaga, Carol (D) - 808-586-6890
senfukunaga@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Hooser, Gary L. (D) - 808-586-6030
senhooser@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Ihara, Les (D) - 808-586-6250
senihara@Capitol.hawaii.gov
Kidani, Michelle (D) - 808-586-7100
senkidani@capitol.hawaii.gov

It is very important we continue spread the word, so please feel free to forward this blog to those on your contact list. Every voice counts, so don't be bashful, and certainly don't be discouraged by this setback. The Family Equality Coalition Advocacy Center is a great source of information, so keep up to date by joining and supporting them... to do so click here.

Don't be Gaycist!

2009-02-22T21:23:00.000-10:00

I heard a radio advertisement talking about the Civil Union Bill that has passed Hawai'i's House of Representatives. The advertisement called for people to rally together in protest at the State Capitol today. I had to work, but out of curiosity I went in 30 minutes early just to see what the whole commotion was about. I was absolutely stunned at the amount of people who showed up to protest. Of course with my own damn bad luck, I wore a red shirt the same day the protestors decide to wear a red shirt to symbolize the death of this Jesus fella who apparently hates the gays.

It turns out, 2 christian churches actually bussed people to the capitol to protest and numbers were said to have been in the thousands... I can easily see that! I left the "festivities" and headed to work. The entire time I was at work, I wasn't sitting easy. I was in disbelief not only at the sheer volume of protestors, but the lack of supporters... I saw NONE! Not to worry, Kawika to the rescue. I ended up taking my lunch break almost immediately as I printed out a quick sign, taped it to a clipboard and went to stand up for equal rights.

I walked to the center of the capital, barely walking room for anyone, and I held up my sign. A small circle quickly gathered around me shouting obscenities at me. Apparently I'm gonna burn in the eternal fire pits of hell, but Jesus still loves me o_O. People young and old had no problems screaming at me to repent before it's too late. It got old really fast, but I stood there with my head held just as high as my sign. You know, for a bunch of Christians, there sure weren't very many people acting very Christ-like... mais c'est la vie. Eventually a young man found me and said there were a small group of supporters near the street waving signs... So I went to join them. By small, he meant SMALL... only about 5 people in a sea of red shirts. I eventually took off my shirt and held my sign in silence as people drove by honking in support of the protestors. There were a fair amount of people driving by yelling at the protestors to go home, and I have to admit, I've never been so happy to see people flipping the bird as they drove!

Ignorance is indeed bliss, and these protestors literally are in paradise. The local paper actually quoted a lady, who was with her husband and 5 year old daughter all wearing "protect traditional marriage" t-shirts, as saying, "marriage is meant for procreation and if this bill passes it will end the human race." On that note, some people just shouldn't have the ability to procreate.

I am frustrated that bigotry is masked by religious beliefs. One has to appreciate the irony that religion gives people hope in a world torn apart by religion. America took a huge step forward by electing Hawai'i born Obama. Why then does it seem that Hawai'i is going backwards?

My New York Minute

2009-02-19T22:58:00.000-10:00

For as long as I can remember, anytime New York was mentioned I thought of high fashion, buildings that stretched higher than mountains, and the hustle and bustle of the average New Yorkers' subway commute. A couple weeks ago I spontaneously booked a trip to the Big Apple for the long President's Day weekend, but because I booked it in such haste, I didn't really have time to research things to do while I was there. I'm a free spirit, and pretty spontaneous, so I was more than happy going where the wind blew me once I arrived.

To my extreme delight a dear friend of mine, Andrés, (whom I'd never met face to face before) graciously took on the task of being my tour guide. From the very first moment I met him, I could barely contain my excitement and of course he noticed every reaction I had to every little thing. I wasn't embarrassed, but I was more aware of how excited I became from cars honking every other second to the way people unapologetically jay walk.

There was a defining moment when I actually felt like I was in New York. Andrés and I were dropped off near his apartment and walked across the street to the first New York train station I've ever been. I thought: look at this street... look at these people... look at the train station... OMG, I'm in New York!! I do admit, I was terrified being there... just so overwhelmed by everything. I did feel safer knowing Andrés was with me, but not even that stopped me from almost being punched in the face by some random drunk fella in the subway.

After the first day, I realized I had to shake off the fear of being an island boy in a big city or I wouldn't enjoy myself at all. New York is fundamentally so opposite extreme of life in Hawai'i but surprisingly wasn't hard to adjust to my surroundings at all. Before long I was dodging traffic, jay walking and riding the train like a pro! I realized that the initial feelings I had of being overwhelmed were gone, and I felt like I blended in quite well.

The days flew by, but were jam packed with so many different things that it's all just a blur to me. One day in particular, we caught the Staten Island Ferry and on the return trip back I had another surreal moment. We were standing in the front of the ferry, just passed the Statue of Liberty and I got a glimpse of lower Manhattan and OMG... I thought I was going to explode from excitement... It was crazy!! At that moment I felt SO alive and couldn't believe I was finally there... a place I had only dreamed of being and beside such an incredible man nonetheless! I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I leaned over and impetuously hugged Andrés and thanked him for everything.

On my last day Andrés took me to the Rockefeller Center. We spent some time downstairs taking photos and watching all the ice skaters fall before we headed to the Top of the Rock which has several observation decks with amazing views of the city. As comfortable as I'd gotten being there, the moment I had my first glimpse of the view I was immediately overwhelmed. All the feelings I experienced when I first arrived came rushing back to me and I couldn't help but feel like a little island boy in the middle of this huge city.

I stood there in awe, just taking in everything... enjoying the warmth of the sun and a slight cool breeze. I tried to explain to Andrés what I was feeling and got choked up mid-sentence as reality sunk in. I accomplished what was once just a big dream to a little island boy. I remember telling him that I wish my family could see what I was seeing and it took just about every ounce of my energy to choke back my tears. Of course I was also choking back tears because I didn't want to have to say goodbye to him. After a few moments on the various observation decks, we started walking towards the exit. I don't know who mentioned it, but neither of us were ready to leave, so we turned right back around and enjoyed the views once again. I honestly didn't want the day to end but instead of worrying about the day eventually ending I just enjoyed the moment.

We eventually left the Rockefeller Center and had one last drink together in a revolving restaurant in the Marriott. My heart sank as each minute passed because I was afraid of saying farewell. It was difficult trying to enjoy the moment with an inevitable goodbye looming around the corner... but I still managed to have a laugh or three. On the train ride back to Queens I was desperately trying to keep busy with anything to distract me from the final send off which was fast approaching. I didn't want to cry, not cause I was afraid to, but because I didn't think I'd be able to stop. The last moment I had with Andrés was at the same defining spot where I first felt like I was actually in New York... near the train station by his place. I love that we had come full circle to the point where it all began 5 days earlier.

I loved every second of my New York Minute... almost being punched in the face and all! The most memorable thing about the trip was not the city, the bars, nor the sights... rather spending real time with Andrés. I shall always remember how every morning I'd get a text, we'd meet up, have lunch, then head out for the day. As simple as that may sound, it means more to me than he could ever know... more than I could ever express. You see, I don't have very many friends, but the few friends I do have mean the world to me, so of course spending time in person with such an incredible man is invaluable. Andrés is one of my favourite people in the world and if at all possible, meeting him has only made me love and appreciate him and his friendship even more.

Life Happens

2009-01-07T17:33:00.000-10:00

I just received news of a colleague's death. I was not particularly close with him, and had very minimal interactions with him, but it is affecting me all the same. I suppose it has triggered thoughts of my own mortality. He was only 40 and was as healthy as can be and in great shape... very fit. I am in the dark about the circumstances surrounding his death, but a death is a death is a death. It just goes to show, no matter who you are, what you do, or how much you weigh, tomorrow is never guaranteed.

My thoughts immediately go to Steven Mackin , a long time friend whom I never had the chance to meet face to face. He passed away over 2 years ago and my single greatest regret was that I didn't get to hug or kiss him & tell him I love him in person. Since that day, I realized that I don't want to live my life with regret... and I've made some choices to live my life differently since then. I never make decisions anymore based on how practical they are. I live my life on a whim, and am quick to do anything remotely spontaneous, as evident by my new year's day fiasco.

I started off 2009 in great company, and in great spirits. I am still counting on the momentum to get me through the first half of this month. I work without a day off from two full time jobs until next Wednesday night after my first job, when I officially start my vacation. I'm flying back to Florida to spend time with my best friend... who is such a large part of my life. I love and adore this man, and with my thoughts the way they are, they will certainly remind me to appreciate every moment by his side.

Wika in a nutshell

2009-01-01T12:23:00.000-10:00

I lead a pretty boring life from the outside looking in, but from my eyes I see a completely different world. A few years ago I lost a dear friend who was only 8 days my elder. I never had the honour of meeting him face to face, and will never have that chance. Since then, I've decided to take control of my life and make the most of it. I never base decisions anymore on how practical they are. I travel as frequently as I can and am very spontaneous.

Currently I am working 2 full time jobs... I manage a storage facility for an escrow company during the day and I am night supervisor for a local airline on nights and weekends. I don't need both jobs to survive, but I certainly live comfortably with two incomes. Other than abnormal sleeping and eating habits, there's no real negative aspect of working both jobs simultaneously.

I am the youngest of 4 children. My 3 siblings were very close in age to each other, the oldest being 9 years older than me, so a substantial age difference. Naturally as teenagers, they spent majority of their time out with friends and at the mall while I was left home alone since my parents worked all hours of the day and night.

I suppose I've always been that loner kid. I was well liked in school, but lived on the other side of the island from where I attended so I didn't have any school mates nearby. I was conditioned to being alone at a young age. I wasn't unhappy about being alone, it's just the way things were growing up. I won't say I'm the black sheep of the family, but at the end of the day, I definitely stand out from my siblings.

My mom and dad were hardly home growing up, and when they were, they spent majority of their time arguing... it wasn't an odd sight to see things breaking or flying across the room while cops were knocking on our door. It wasn't every day, but it certainly happened frequently enough for it to be deemed the norm.

The most difficult thing about my childhood is that I always knew I was gay. My earliest memory I can see myself molesting my he-man action figure because I really liked his muscles... apparently I've always like burly guys! I was raised in a roman catholic household with a father that made us attend services every Sunday... so I felt like I couldn't tell anyone because I was afraid of being pointed at and ridiculed and of course with the god fearing mindset... going to hell. I remember my mom asking me probably when I was in 2nd grade if I was gay and I told her no. Of course it came as no surprise to her when I finally came out at age 22.

By my 18th birthday, I had moved out to my own place. I didn't leave with a heavy heart, but I was happy to be away from the drama. I ended up in a mentally and physically abusive relationship for the first 3 years of my adult life. I had very low self esteem and self worth issues that I didn't know how to deal with. My initial reaction was the same destructive behaviour that I saw at home. I knew I had to break the chain and find another way to cope with my emotions. I turned my frustrations into creative energy. I found I was able to write poetry, compose music, and draw when I was emotionally charged... but unfortunately for my creative side, I've been remarkably stable for the last couple years with no creative juices at all. I'm afraid I may have lost it, but I am much happier to know I no longer need that outlet!

I live comfortably, enjoy my life, and although I'm not exactly a social butterfly with tons of friends, I do have a handful of substantial people in my life... most of whom are not even in Hawai'i. I enjoy meeting new people and sparking friendships with people around the world. I have no expectations of meeting Mr. right and my perspective on the definition of a relationship has recently changed. I may not be an adonis nor my body chiseled from stone, but I am an interesting man with fantastic views on life, a great sense of humour and a positive attitude.

Why I'm here...

2009-01-01T12:16:00.000-10:00

I was a member of a couple different websites that had a blog section and used these blogs more as a personal journal than a useful source of information for others. I found myself frequenting them less and less as time progressed and I made a quick decision to close them down. In my haste, I forgot to consider my blogs. It finally hit me a couple weeks later when I was in one of those moods to read through some of my old writings. I was gutted when I realized that I had effectively lost the last 8 years of writings and videos of songs I've done that could only be found there. :(

So here I am... starting over, and trying to find a place on the web to call home. I am trying a couple different sites to see where I want to settle down. In the meantime, I'll be experimenting between them. I'm also considering registering my own domain, that way I'll never have to worry about the site going down.

I'll sort it out eventually...